Where are all the women interested in Women’s Rights?

Last month I challenged you with an experiment as to who makes the best Juror for a female victim’s sexual assault trial.  The result was interesting.  Only men responded.  I know I have a fair readership. It’s a reasonable inference that there are a few women readers out there.

I was surprised by their lack of response. There are three possibilities. Women are too shy to express an opinion. I cannot believe that. My wife, like many women, readily shares a variety of opinions ranging from the business pages, Indigenous grievances to my neatness and picking up my sock

Embarrassment is not an option. I destroy all names and won’t use them in any articles to cause concern unless you ask otherwise. Also, remember I am retired so I have no powers of contempt for defiance or ability to over-rule a disagreement.  I want to debate ideas. Your opinions are important. I encourage suggestions for topics. Write and list topics for future discussions. The last possibility here and the most frightening is where women don’t see these issues as significant. Please don’t disappoint my belief in the feminist movement.

I have two young grand-daughters. I feel if more women were in power, compromise over tribalism would prevail.  As a result, I will postpone my results one more month hoping some women will take up my challenge before I explain the experiment.

While on the topic of Women Power, let’s talk about the ’Me Too’ movement. I feel it is too limited when seen purely as feminist issue. Do not get me wrong, the matter is extremely important but has a wider scope  related to power abuse – a person of  power taking advantage of someone with less power who cannot protest.  It is  seen as a significant women’s issue because in the workplace women still hold most of the inferior positions  lacking equality.

This issue of power abuse, too a much lesser extent than sexual abuse, was personal in my career as I moved from lawyer to Queens Counsel to the lead of the Criminal Law Department, while surrounded by some superiors telling me stupid Polish Jokes, like “Newfie” jokes, which ridiculed a whole population including me.  I could either stand up to the unfairness of the topic or ignore them.  To call out the comments I would identify myself as an ‘Outsider’ and hurt my chance of advancement. By being quiet and being part of the group, I would be confirming a false assumption about a group of individuals and adding to a bias.  People with power must understand their position and use it wisely.

The concept of a power imbalance is also important when we teach our children about sexual relations. We need to understand this idea of abuse of power. Parents who say sex education belongs solely to the family would be surprised at the number of persons charged or victims of sexual assaults who were never given any training on the subject.  Very few parents teach their children on this matter. It’s an “icky subject” for a parent and even more so for the child yet it is extremely important. Remember, knowledge is power.  You want your children to have the power of control.

I bet you would find it hard to explain the nature of consent to your son or daughter. In assessing ‘consent’ it must be clear to both parties that each have made an informed and free consent as equals to the relationship.  That means no power imbalance such as age, experience, alcohol, drugs, age or experience, position or even lies creating a power imbalance between two people by diminishing the power of one to give  free and informed consent. To simply assume there was consent is dangerous.

“Informed” means you understand all the consequences of your actions. That means there can be no abuse of power.  Some believe that teaching sex will advance promiscuity so they tend to keep the female ill-informed of the physical nature of sex.  In reality it encourages the tradition of male power over the female.  Actually, promiscuity is reduced by correct understanding of the topic. It amazed me as to the number of victims, some over thirty, who had difficulty in testifying didn’t even know the technical name for body parts.

For these reasons I endorse sex education and the understanding of relationships in our schools for both boys and girls if you want to generate equality and reduce power imbalances. Sex education leaves the morality to the parents and the physical sciences to the school.  How many of you agree or disagree – write me and challenge the idea.

Judge Lloyd Budzinski retired after 28 years and was a former Crown Attorney, Defence Counsel and Ontario’s Assistant Deputy Minister of Criminal Law. He was Chief Prosecutor in the trial of ex-RCMP officer Patrick Michael Kelly, found guilty of murder for throwing his wife from a 17th floor balcony in March 1981.

He can be reached at lbudzinski@talkjustice.info